In this video Matthew Hussey, a dating coach shares the number one flirting mistake women make with men.
One of those reasons could be that when around a guy you really like, you probably tend to get nervous.
When you start to get nervous parts of you will start shutting down, such as your charisma, your charm and your wit. When this happens you are only allowing the guy you want to notice you, notice that you are boring. He needs to see you aren’t boring, but spontaneous and humorous. But stop flirting if you are nervous, as this will only push the guy away.
What is the greatest flirting mistake women make?
They tend to stop flirting all together. We do this because we don’t want to leave ourselves vulnerable. Just the very idea we may have to show someone that we like them is scary. The problem here is that flirting isn’t actually running up to someone and saying, “Hey I like you. I want us to be together.” This is not flirting. Flirting is very subtle, kind of like putting a small piece of bait on the tackle and throwing out your fishing line to see who you might be able to catch.
For instance, you may like one of your co-workers.
You walk into the office one day and there is the guy you have been crushing on. You see him near the coffee pot and think, “This is my chance, my moment.” Say you walk over to your crush and say, “Hey. I have been developing feelings for you, I really like you a lot, and maybe we should go out.” Sometimes honesty is not the best policy. Here you have managed to create a very awkward moment. You have left him in a really bad position where he may feel like he has to say yes, or politely refuse, and make an excuse to get back to his desk.
The second example of flirting, in the same situation, with a coworker, you may walk up to him, meaning to flirt, and ask him why he is always at the coffee machine when I come to make my coffee.
This situation gives the guy the chance to flirt back by saying something like, “Maybe you are the one that follows me to the coffee machine. Did you ever think about that?” Playfully tell him to get out of the way so you can make your coffee, and walking away turn and tell him it is a good thing that you are coworkers, because together, they may make some trouble. That is one example of how to flirt with the guy you like.
When using a method such as this, you are essentially leaving the ball in his court to make the next move.
Flirting in itself is a vulnerable action, so you don’t want to go all in at once. Flirt a little bit here and wait and see if he makes his move.
About Matthew Hussey
Matthew Hussey, speaker and New York Times Bestselling author, serves as a matchmaker on “Ready for Love,” NBC’s innovative and dramatic new relationship show about making real connections.
Through his online programs, viral internet broadcasts, sell-out seminars, NYT Bestselling book, and his roster of private clients, he has been able to pass on his insights and strategies to countless people. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. Hussey is the new international guru of the dating and relationship-coaching scene.