In this video Matthew Hussey talks about shyness and being an introvert. Are the two one and the same? What can you do if you are a shy person?
Being Shy and Being an Introvert
It can be argued that being shy and being an introvert are not the same thing. While they are synonyms of each other in the dictionary, here is the difference. We associate the word introvert with a person’s nature, but we associate shyness as being derived from insecurity. When we say we are shy we are talking about fear of rejection, embarrassment and nervousness. Saying someone is shy is a polite way of saying they are scared.
To overcome shyness you have to overcome rejection. One way is to be accepted or get a positive result from talking with someone. The second way to overcome rejection is to get more rejection. Going through rejection can help desensitize you to it.
Decide who you want to be
You need to decide the kind of person you want to be, regardless of acceptance or rejection. Many people feel the need for immediate acceptance, but this is not the way life works. If you go into a situation craving acceptance in the short term, you will only look needy. Instead go for rejection and stay to true to who you are and who you want to be.
You’re not shy, you are boring. Being an introvert may be part of your nature, but acting shy is not. Shyness comes from fear of rejection or embarrassment and leads to nervousness. It’s up to you to decide who you want to be. Embrace rejection and stay true to yourself and who you want to be. If you crave acceptance in the short term, people will perceive you as needy. Instead, overcome your fear of rejection by putting yourself in more situations in which you may be rejected.
About Matthew Hussey
Matthew Hussey, speaker and New York Times Bestselling author, serves as a matchmaker on “Ready for Love,” NBC’s innovative and dramatic new relationship show about making real connections.
Through his online programs, viral internet broadcasts, sell-out seminars, NYT Bestselling book, and his roster of private clients, he has been able to pass on his insights and strategies to countless people. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. Hussey is the new international guru of the dating and relationship-coaching scene.